To The Woman Who Feels Less Than

It’s Valentine’s week. In some circles, it’s that obligatory week for flowers and chocolate…things that in my opinion would mean way more on a random non-holiday. For others, it’s widely known as “Singles Awareness Day.”

I’ve never liked Valentine’s Day. Even when I was married, I refused to acknowledge the day, giver or receiver. I’ve never been a fan of hearts or the color combination of pink and red, not to mention the candy just gets in the way of THE greatest holiday candy ever, Easter.

So in the midst of news feeds clogged with kissing selfies and posts way to sappy for even #sappypost, I wanted to slide a little encouragement to women, regardless of your relational status.

My pastor asked us in a recent sermon series, “What breaks your heart?”

My quick and honest answer: Any woman who feels she is less than her invaluable worth.

It’s any woman who believes she just does not or will not ever measure up to her standards or to those of the world. It breaks my heart to know there are countless women who feel they are never enough.

Why does this break my heart?
Because I’ve battled this exact sentiment for 25 years of my life, as a child and teen striving to earn every A in the book, as a 20-something wondering if a man would ever want to marry me, as a fiancé of a man who literally swept me off my feet, and as wife to this same man who loved me extravagantly. Throw in the oddity of being widowed at 30 and back at the singles rodeo for a second go-round. That pretty much rounds out the entire spectrum.

It’s the plague of never enough.
The haunting feeling of walking around believing I am less than.
It’s a plague that plays both sides, whether relationships and earthly love is plentiful or almost non-existent.
And it’s a plague that is downright exhausting, life draining, joy stealing.
It is not how our great God with his unending, unfailing love intends for us to live.

I don’t have some magic formula or medicine to break the curse, to break the lies I’ve told and retold myself. It’s not as if I woke up one day and I suddenly thought differently about myself.

It’s taken time, it’s taken a lot of renewing my mind. It’s taking me “throwing away” any untruth either myself or someone else has caused me to believe or feel about myself.
It’s taken a lot of capturing thoughts in my head and making them align with how my Heavenly Father feels about me.

He feels the same way about you.

So this Valentine’s Day, whether you buy your own flowers or get sent 10 dozen roses, whether you’re rocking your flannel pjs or a smoking’ hot little black dress, whether you have no one to tell you “I love you” or Mr. Wonderful is shouting it to you from the rooftops…

You, YOU, are dearly loved…

By the God of the Universe, who created you, woman, for the display of His beauty,

He delights in you and knows you by name.
He is the One who knows how you feel, and it breaks His heart.
He is the One who wants immeasurably more for you, and that more includes you seeing you as He sees you…loved, beautiful, accepted…

and enough.
You are enough.
Enough.

I finally began believing this a little over a year ago.
It has literally changed my life. I pray it changes yours too.

Dearly loved, and claiming that for every woman,
Melissa

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